So this post isn't meant to come across as pretentious, arrogant, or whatever but it probably will because human beings are prideful and I don't know how to finish this sentence.
I'm not content with my flickr views.
When I post a really good photo and it hits flickr explore I get like 10 comments on that photo, maybe 2 or 3 people will add me as a contact and I'll get up to 300 extra views total for the day.
But that doesn't happen very often.
For the most part, my photos get between 10-20 views when I upload them, and then sporadically they'll get 1-3 sometimes.
And like... I don't know. I think they're good. Some I think are really good. Some of my friends on flickr who're really good have told me I'm pretty much on their levels. I have had at least two people tell me my photos deserve more views, faves, basically attention than they get.
And I don't know what I'm doing or whatever. Because I add tags to my photos so it'll show up when searched, I add them to plenty of groups, etc.
And then some of my friends on flickr don't tag their photos, don't add them to groups, and they'll still get like 10 comments on an AVERAGE photo. We have about the same number of people added on flickr too, it's not like they've got 1000 people added compared to my 303. (Ha. 303. It's a band, 3OH3. Anyway)
I see a lot of people who are all like "It's not about the faves and comments, it's about the ART." And I counter that with, "Good art generally gets attention. And my art's not getting so much, is my art bad?"
And I'm not saying I'm one of the ELITE photographers and everything I produce is amazing and I have nothing more to learn, etc etc etc...
But I've been improving! I can see it in my photos! And I've been putting WORK into my photos recently, I'm not just taking one shot and then "Yep, I have a photo for today."
No.
I am walking down to the park, or mission trails, or driving to Grossmont, setting up my tripod, figuring out a pose, and taking at least 20 shots and hoping one comes out good.
It's just like GAH, I want...
I want some freakin' RECOGNITION. Which sounds really stupid to say, because I do get a few people commenting saying "Oh I like this" or "Oh good colours" (P.S. forget spell check, I'm spelling it BRITISH) but I guess I'm selfish because one or two comments just isn't enough.
I've been trying to be more active on flickr lately.
Leaving more comments and faving more pictures and hoping "Do unto others" applies to the internet as well.
Maybe if I just stopped caring I'd get more views, I don't know.
I've run out of steam, I don't even know what I'm typing anymore.
You can tell because of all the "I don't know" 's showing up.
Blah blah post ends blah.
Monday, May 11, 2009
Saturday, May 9, 2009
365 Days
In the off chance you haven't heard, I'm taking a self portrait every single day of the year this year over at http://flickr.com/photos/sethrader
Anyway. Here's some true facts.
While doing the 365 day challenge:
1) You are going to humiliate yourself
2) You will probably get outside a lot more
3) You will become one with the camera's timer
4) You will likely be cussed out at some point
5) You are going to see improvement in yourself and your skills
6) You'll become annoyed when people take your picture, because it probably won't be as good as if you took it.
7) You'll be less self-conscious about seeing pictures of them
8) You'll learn what you don't like about yourself physically. For example, I cannot STAND the side of my face.
9) You will find things. Pages of the Bible in a field, etc. You will also learn how to pick up a piece of trash and make it an amazing prop.
10) You are going to be challenged.
That's my list.
I almost said my jam.
Because The Glamour Manifesto is my jam for lately.
I stole calling things my jam from my classmate Julia except you say her name like HOO-lee-uh because she's Mexican.
Why am I telling you this.
Anyway. Here's some true facts.
While doing the 365 day challenge:
1) You are going to humiliate yourself
2) You will probably get outside a lot more
3) You will become one with the camera's timer
4) You will likely be cussed out at some point
5) You are going to see improvement in yourself and your skills
6) You'll become annoyed when people take your picture, because it probably won't be as good as if you took it.
7) You'll be less self-conscious about seeing pictures of them
8) You'll learn what you don't like about yourself physically. For example, I cannot STAND the side of my face.
9) You will find things. Pages of the Bible in a field, etc. You will also learn how to pick up a piece of trash and make it an amazing prop.
10) You are going to be challenged.
That's my list.
I almost said my jam.
Because The Glamour Manifesto is my jam for lately.
I stole calling things my jam from my classmate Julia except you say her name like HOO-lee-uh because she's Mexican.
Why am I telling you this.
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
My classmate is a PIG.
I'm sitting in the back, he's in the corner like a yard from me.
This girl that he and like ALL of the "gangsta" 's of my class are constantly flirting with, takes off her headphones because he called her.
He starts saying "C'mere girl." like she's a DOG and making kissing noises.
He keeps just saying it over and over, "C'mere girl!" *kiss kiss kiss kiss* "C'mere!" *kiss kiss*
I'm sitting here, my rage slowly building.
She's just staring at him, with a slight glare, a "What the **** do you think you're doing?" look.
Then his friend says, "Hey, c'mere. Not because he said so, but because I said so."
And then the two get in an argument about that.
I probably should have told him off.
Or at least told him to stop saying words.
This girl that he and like ALL of the "gangsta" 's of my class are constantly flirting with, takes off her headphones because he called her.
He starts saying "C'mere girl." like she's a DOG and making kissing noises.
He keeps just saying it over and over, "C'mere girl!" *kiss kiss kiss kiss* "C'mere!" *kiss kiss*
I'm sitting here, my rage slowly building.
She's just staring at him, with a slight glare, a "What the **** do you think you're doing?" look.
Then his friend says, "Hey, c'mere. Not because he said so, but because I said so."
And then the two get in an argument about that.
I probably should have told him off.
Or at least told him to stop saying words.
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Interrup- LOL, WORDS
People... interrupting... annoys me. A lot.
Being introverted, I don't really try and control the conversation. If I think I have something of value to say, I kind of plan out what I'm going to say in my head, wait for a quiet spot in the conversation, then interject my two cents.
Basically... I try and make it meaningful. Like, especially with more serious topics.
So when people INTERRUPT... It's not just that you've stopped me from talking, your actions are seriously saying "I could care less about what you've prepared and planned to say, my opinions and thoughts are more important and I need to say them now."
Ugh.
Introversion is hard sometimes.
Never letting anything out. Well almost never.
I found this funny comic about introverts. I think I have it on my hard drive. It was like, "You are an: introvert. Introverts:
1) THINK running their flapping mouths and getting nowhere
2) Do work instead of bickering and squabbling and wasting time
There was one more but I forgot it.
I wish more people knew that there was this introvert/extrovert thing going on.
I know some people who're like "What? Being around other people makes you exhausted, not charges you up? What is WRONG with you?"
I just want to tell them off, because of course nothing's wrong with me.
OH!
Speaking of telling off.
There was this thing.
An image.
That I saw earlier today.
It was a picture of a protester.
Holding a sign.
The sign said,
"Jesus had 2 fathers, why can't I?"
THAT. MADE. ME. ANGRY.
I mean, that's... that's... that's not even LOGICAL. It's... I've been using absurd and ridiculous too much. I need to go find synonyms. It's LUDICROUS.
I really, really, really hate that phrase. DUH HUH, JESUS HAD 2 FATHERS- YEAH, SHUT UP.
GRAH.
I don't even want to see it again. Ever.
Being introverted, I don't really try and control the conversation. If I think I have something of value to say, I kind of plan out what I'm going to say in my head, wait for a quiet spot in the conversation, then interject my two cents.
Basically... I try and make it meaningful. Like, especially with more serious topics.
So when people INTERRUPT... It's not just that you've stopped me from talking, your actions are seriously saying "I could care less about what you've prepared and planned to say, my opinions and thoughts are more important and I need to say them now."
Ugh.
Introversion is hard sometimes.
Never letting anything out. Well almost never.
I found this funny comic about introverts. I think I have it on my hard drive. It was like, "You are an: introvert. Introverts:
1) THINK running their flapping mouths and getting nowhere
2) Do work instead of bickering and squabbling and wasting time
There was one more but I forgot it.
I wish more people knew that there was this introvert/extrovert thing going on.
I know some people who're like "What? Being around other people makes you exhausted, not charges you up? What is WRONG with you?"
I just want to tell them off, because of course nothing's wrong with me.
OH!
Speaking of telling off.
There was this thing.
An image.
That I saw earlier today.
It was a picture of a protester.
Holding a sign.
The sign said,
"Jesus had 2 fathers, why can't I?"
THAT. MADE. ME. ANGRY.
I mean, that's... that's... that's not even LOGICAL. It's... I've been using absurd and ridiculous too much. I need to go find synonyms. It's LUDICROUS.
I really, really, really hate that phrase. DUH HUH, JESUS HAD 2 FATHERS- YEAH, SHUT UP.
GRAH.
I don't even want to see it again. Ever.
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Well I found this interesting.
I don't know who the quote belongs to. But oh well.
"People who watch TV:
Symbolically not doing something for the sake of not doing it is almost never evidence of sophistication. It is evidence of not knowing what you’re f***ing talking about. Are we really still having this conversation? Television is a part of the cultural landscape at this point—a lot of it is good. A lot of it is bad, some of which is also good. You know, LIKE ALL THINGS MADE BY HUMANS? Obviously it is also a good idea to go outside once in a while. But the presence of a television in your home does not make that decision for you. You make it. Feel free to still go outside at any time."
"People who watch TV:
Symbolically not doing something for the sake of not doing it is almost never evidence of sophistication. It is evidence of not knowing what you’re f***ing talking about. Are we really still having this conversation? Television is a part of the cultural landscape at this point—a lot of it is good. A lot of it is bad, some of which is also good. You know, LIKE ALL THINGS MADE BY HUMANS? Obviously it is also a good idea to go outside once in a while. But the presence of a television in your home does not make that decision for you. You make it. Feel free to still go outside at any time."
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Author's Notes
You know how books have those "author's notes" in the back?
I never read those.
Not anymore.
They're usually dull, filled with "I'd like to thank.." or "It's been a fun ride..." or "I hope you enjoyed..."
Awful.
But, after finishing "Lucas" by Kevin Brooks, I felt like I had to. The book was just.. different. You can't really explain it in english. Well, you sort of can because by reading the book you'd understand what I mean, but I don't know how to tell you it was different, other than it was.
But I'm really rambling.
The entire point of this post, is to post the first half of the author's notes.
Here goes:
"To me a good book is like a quiet friend -- a friend who's happy to share thoughts and feelings with you, who's always there when you need them. Best of all, this friend doesn't have any secrets. They trust you to understand them. They take you to their innermost places. They share their sensations and emotions -- and they let you experience them. Wherever you go and however you feel, they are always by your side. For an hour, a day, a week, or forever -- their life becomes yours. Their story is your story. That's the kind of book I'm trying to write." - Kevin Brooks
I never read those.
Not anymore.
They're usually dull, filled with "I'd like to thank.." or "It's been a fun ride..." or "I hope you enjoyed..."
Awful.
But, after finishing "Lucas" by Kevin Brooks, I felt like I had to. The book was just.. different. You can't really explain it in english. Well, you sort of can because by reading the book you'd understand what I mean, but I don't know how to tell you it was different, other than it was.
But I'm really rambling.
The entire point of this post, is to post the first half of the author's notes.
Here goes:
"To me a good book is like a quiet friend -- a friend who's happy to share thoughts and feelings with you, who's always there when you need them. Best of all, this friend doesn't have any secrets. They trust you to understand them. They take you to their innermost places. They share their sensations and emotions -- and they let you experience them. Wherever you go and however you feel, they are always by your side. For an hour, a day, a week, or forever -- their life becomes yours. Their story is your story. That's the kind of book I'm trying to write." - Kevin Brooks
Friday, April 10, 2009
I HAVE UNPOPULAR OPINIONS.
Everyone looks at me like I'm a total moron, when I say I want to save my first kiss for my wedding day.
I've been told it's unrealistic, pathetic, naive, stupid, and more.
I have been told "You wouldn't buy a car without taking it for a test drive, would you?" (Wow, way to objectify women. Women =/= cars, and for those unfamiliar, =/= means "does/do not equal).
I don't think it'll be easy. There'll probably be some point in time when I let temptation win, and I give in. But really, EVERYONE I've talked about it with, is rather discouraging about such a decision. Like, it's just NOT DONE.
Which kind of just makes me *all the more determined* to do it. I mean, nobody else is doing it. I'll go for it.
This is probably really easy talk for me though, seeing as I don't have a girlfriend.
Maybe I'm just afraid of getting involved and investing myself with someone.
I see almost all of my friends hooking up, breaking up, happy one day and crying the next. I don't want to be like that. I don't want to become that.
And it doesn't help, either, that there's probably two girls I'd consider dating right now. Both of which, I know, are liked by other guys. And I, being the very introverted non-dominant person that I am, I'm not going to even tell the girls I'm interested in them, let alone date them.
Drama.
Drama drama fracking drama.
This post is totally improvised by the way, I'm typing it as it comes.
I kind of want, like, the experience though.
I need someone to go on, pardon the expression, kick-ass photography adventures with.
Before you say friends, friends get busy. Friends make plans with other friends. Friends have personal projects.
I just realized.
This kind of internal kind of pain/longing is way way way way easier to go through than braces.
Braces is like hell. In your mouth.
And let's see, I've got parents who love me, a roof over my head, plenty to eat and drink, my own camera and laptop and bed and room and Nintendo DS and a car to drive and money to pay for gas and my own iPod and computer speakers that (for the most part) work, I have a tripod and blankets and a bass guitar and awesome friends that put up with rants like this one, I've got an incredible home church with awesome worship that connects me to God, and I've got a GOD who loves me.
SO MAYBE I SHOULD STOP COMPLAINING.
I've been told it's unrealistic, pathetic, naive, stupid, and more.
I have been told "You wouldn't buy a car without taking it for a test drive, would you?" (Wow, way to objectify women. Women =/= cars, and for those unfamiliar, =/= means "does/do not equal).
I don't think it'll be easy. There'll probably be some point in time when I let temptation win, and I give in. But really, EVERYONE I've talked about it with, is rather discouraging about such a decision. Like, it's just NOT DONE.
Which kind of just makes me *all the more determined* to do it. I mean, nobody else is doing it. I'll go for it.
This is probably really easy talk for me though, seeing as I don't have a girlfriend.
Maybe I'm just afraid of getting involved and investing myself with someone.
I see almost all of my friends hooking up, breaking up, happy one day and crying the next. I don't want to be like that. I don't want to become that.
And it doesn't help, either, that there's probably two girls I'd consider dating right now. Both of which, I know, are liked by other guys. And I, being the very introverted non-dominant person that I am, I'm not going to even tell the girls I'm interested in them, let alone date them.
Drama.
Drama drama fracking drama.
This post is totally improvised by the way, I'm typing it as it comes.
I kind of want, like, the experience though.
I need someone to go on, pardon the expression, kick-ass photography adventures with.
Before you say friends, friends get busy. Friends make plans with other friends. Friends have personal projects.
I just realized.
This kind of internal kind of pain/longing is way way way way easier to go through than braces.
Braces is like hell. In your mouth.
And let's see, I've got parents who love me, a roof over my head, plenty to eat and drink, my own camera and laptop and bed and room and Nintendo DS and a car to drive and money to pay for gas and my own iPod and computer speakers that (for the most part) work, I have a tripod and blankets and a bass guitar and awesome friends that put up with rants like this one, I've got an incredible home church with awesome worship that connects me to God, and I've got a GOD who loves me.
SO MAYBE I SHOULD STOP COMPLAINING.
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