Crud

Well I'm essentially grounded.
Wasn't TOLD I was but I'm restricted from most things people are restricted from when they're grounded.

I really don't feel like typing out the details, suffice to say it's my fault because I told a lie.

But DANGIT I'm pissed, and kind of depressed too.

I really wish people would stop trying to make me care, because I DO care, really. But when I'm PUSHED to care more, I just want to fight it and stop caring.

And today, I realized I have another phobia besides statues and the dark and other people being near heights.

I kind of want to send it in to postsecret (http://postsecret.blogspot.com for those of you not in the know) but I had another idea for a postsecret and I probably won't get around to making either of the postcards.

I guess I just want to tell someone the secret but not everyone.

So obviously not going to post it here.


I hate it when you have such a smashing good week and then something takes a dump on it.

I hate how you can never really run from anything in life.

I hate how these mature and immature sides of me are bickering.

Immature side: I just want to run.

Mature side: But you can't. Even adults try that, it never works. Not enough to the point where it's worth it.

Immature side: It's not my fault.

Mature side: It's totally your fault and you know it stupid.

Immature side: I hate this.

Mature side: It'll pass.

Immature side:

Mature side:

Haha. Nerd joke.
Ugh that was so lame.
Someone please make me not do that again.


You know, this post really isn't honest enough.
If I was honest enough to write down EXACTLY what I was thinking, this post would be rated R for strong language and I'd be in even MORE trouble.

If my mom read this I might even get in trouble because I said "pissed."

I feel like writing a song, except I was just recently shown by God what an utter lack of passion I have for music despite my ability to play bass guitar and piano so that's a no go.

But I want to express what I feel right now, and I can't do that with one image. (Could, actually. If I wanted to go use GIMP and Aviary or other image editing software but I can't really be bothered to do that right now).

And I don't like making films. And I don't like attempting to compose music when there's other people in the house. And I don't really care to write stories anymore either.

Rant rant rant rant rant, and it's a day earlier than Sunday. Hmm.

Well today I went for a walk after pretty much falling into the "I'm just a pile of crap I suck emo" mode in the late morning, and I went from my house to Allied Gardens which isn't SUPER long but it's long enough so that it's about a 5 minute drive. And it's uphill towards the end. (Well downhill if I had gone the other way on Margerum street.)

Hold on, I'll google it.

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2.7 miles.

I walked 2.7 miles in the wind/sometimes rain.
I'd say cool except I only did it because of a not cool reason.

I pretty much went to the library and then the park to swing for a bit and then the library again and then my friend from school Mary Lou was there which was awesome because I got a chance to rant a bit except it obviously didn't take because here I am typing up this blog post and just going on and on and on about things that I'll probably have forgotten about/won't matter in like five months.

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